His cursor moved on its own, opening his email. A draft appeared, addressed to his professor. The subject line read: “Why I Am a Plagiarizing Soggy Waffle.” The body contained nothing but the script of Despicable Me 1 —every single line of dialogue, typed out in Comic Sans, followed by Leo’s own credit card number.
Suddenly, the screen split into a hundred thumbnail videos. Each one showed Leo, from different angles, sitting in his dorm room at 3:17 AM, downloading the file. A time stamp appeared: RECORDING… despicable me 1 download
He watched the movie. He wrote his analysis. He got a B+. His cursor moved on its own, opening his email
“I have your webcam feed now,” the voice said cheerfully. “I will send this to your mother, your grandmother, and every person you’ve ever liked on Instagram. Unless…” Suddenly, the screen split into a hundred thumbnail videos
“Please,” Leo whispered. “I just wanted to analyze the vector of Gru’s nose.”
“Analyze?” the voice said, almost amused. “You want to study the despicable without paying for it? You think the Minions work for free? Vector’s sweaty tracksuit doesn’t pay for itself.”