Let’s not romanticize it too much. I am scared.
But just below the guilt, there is a strange, expansive peace.
— A very pregnant mother in Tokyo.
A quiet corner of Tokyo, Japan Condition: 39 weeks, 4 days. Very pregnant. Very still. Just before the birth again- Japan- Pregnant- U...
I am no longer a tourist in this country, nor am I a seasoned local. I am something in between: a mother waiting for a second child to arrive. The cherry blossoms have long since fallen. The rainy season came and went. Now, it is the dog days of summer, and the cicadas ( minminzemi ) are screaming their death song. It feels appropriate. Something old is about to end. Something new is about to scream.
I remember the pain of the first birth. I remember the moment the contractions stopped being “waves” and started being a house falling on my spine. I remember the kanji on the hospital wall that I couldn’t read, and the nurse who spoke only Japanese, and the terrifying moment when I realized I had to translate my own moans.
That is the miracle of the second birth. You are not just bringing a child into the world. You are bringing a sibling. You are exploding one universe to create a larger one. Let’s not romanticize it too much
Mata ne. (See you soon.)
Just Before the Birth Again: A Pause in Japan, Heavy with Waiting
I also know that my toddler will be waiting at home. He will be eating okonomiyaki with his grandmother. He will look up when I walk through the door and say, “ Okaeri ” (Welcome home) before he even looks at the baby. — A very pregnant mother in Tokyo
This is my second pregnancy in Japan. You would think the second time is easier. You would be wrong. It is not harder, necessarily. It is deeper .
If you are reading this from a coffee shop in London, or a living room in New York, or a similar apartment in Osaka—take a breath. The waiting is the labor, too. The waiting is the work.
In the West, we pack hospital bags with lavender oil, music playlists, and affirmations. In Japan, my hospital provided a list so specific it felt like a scientific inventory: 2 muji notebooks, 10 pairs of disposable underwear, a yukata for walking the halls, and cash. Always cash.